tell application "Gulfstream IV"
move to cruising altitude
end tell on nearSpeedOfSound
count with shares until smuglySatisfied = true
end tell application "stewardess"
rename to genderNeutral "refreshment operative"
bring me "Vodkatini" and "Jolt Cola"
say "really neat" x 30
end tell tell application "Steve Jobs"
read "Wall Street Journal"
make phoneCall to broker
sell 1% of shares in Akamai
buy island in Pacific, possibly Maui
end tell on phoneCall from "Motorola"
ask "Why are we nowhere near 1GHz yet
and Intel are waving
fast chips around like a five-star
McDonald's employee"
accept grovelling apology listen while lackey explains that it doesn't matter
as high-end Mac users will buy what they're
given, until time comes to a stop
sip Martini
ring Transmeta, anyway
end tell application "Steve Jobs"
wave "swatch of plastics"
look at each until (the swirly lime psychedelic
one is found)
end tell ring "Apple product design group"
tell application "Jonathan Ives"
say "hey, Jonathan, I've found a colour so vile
that it'll completely distract people's attention
next time we drop the CPU speed"
end tell
congratulate me
sip Martini
end ring on phoneCall from "John Lasseter"
momentarily become disturbed by being in the
presence of actual genius
ask for Toy Story characters to make keynote at
Macworld Paris
explain that gambit of simply repeating last US
speech is wearing thin so wouldn't it be better
if a puppet did it anyway
refuse to give Woody a share of the gross
settle for net
agree to separate trailer for Buzz
change subject
ask if (anyonehasnoticedthatgeorge
lucashasreplacedallthehuman
actorsinstarwarstwowithpixar
renderedmodels)
accept response "only because they're acting better"
end if
end on idleThought
wonder how much it would cost to refit this
aeroplane with translucent plastic
wonder what the Woz is doing
wonder if Mac users are really ready to have
BSD Unix thrust into their faces
wonder if the Eazel team have the old pirate flag
end on nearSpeedOfSound
count with shares until smuglySatisfied = true
end tell application "Gulfstream IV"
land
end tell | 
